It wasn’t the whole reason, but it was the final straw for sure – after two days of missed appointments and way-too-long phone calls, the AT&T U-verse dude informed me that, due to our apartment’s electrical system being so old it was actually installed in 1836 by Mescalaro Apaches hoping to trade some day-labor for some booze, we will in fact, not be able to have cable installed, and more importantly I will not be watching the Giro de Italia this weekend.
What follows is my not-so-PG-13 rant on this subject. If you are easily offended, best just to press on down the road.
…Fuck Time Warner, fuck Alexander Graham Bell, fuck Edison and his stupid AC/DC current problem, fuck the Loraine, fuck that stupid smug fucking cable guy, fuck Starbucks, fuck their $2 dollar coffee, fuck the way-to skinny woman who cut in line at Starbucks, fuck the guy in Audi TT that cut me off this morning and then honked at me like i did something wrong, fuck my dental insurance for making me wait a month to change dentists, fuck this goddamn fucking piece of shit network that can’t even load a fucking YouTube clip, fuck George W. Bush just for good measure, fuck this weather for being so damn humid it’s like we’re living in Houston and most of all FUCK YOU AT&T.
And that’s the cleaned up version. Apologies to any who clicked through and were offended.