Click It or Ticket

I have a theory that the Texas Department of transportation has it in for Austin. I think they sit up in their offices in Dallas, making Mister Burn’s-like gestures and ponder different ways to fuck up central Texas. Usually, it’s just by not building any new roads for 30 years, or giving all the construction money to other cities so we have to Toll our highways. And don’t get me started on the debacle that is the Trans Texas Corridor.

Then there’s the condos downtown. There are highrises sprouting allover the place, with the number of cranes making it look like a mini Dubai. I generally support the concept of urban-core density but this is getting a little out of hand. One particularly ugly one is The Monarch, called thus because of the V shaped roof. Originally, I was hoping that it was a mini roof top stadium where they would host the new American Gladiator competition and the loser would get pitched off the roof (sadly no), but apparently it’s just supposed to be reminiscent of a butterfly. Right.

Well to make matters worse, these two bastions of Dallas-ite-ism (it’s not a word but you know what I mean), teamed up this weekend to unfurl a three story tall, block-wide banner, for the click-it-or ticket campaign. Now I’m know math expert, but I do know a little bit about printing, and seriously, you guys couldn’t have use some of that money to say, fix some pot holes? And as far as the building goes, what the hell would posses you to spend millions on luxury high-rise apartment, and then hang a picture of a seatbelt from a 1985 buick, the size of a football field off of it? The real estate market must be very much in the crapper.  It’s not even facing any major roads accept 5th street (lots of 80 mph collisions there). You might be able to get a glimpse of the massive eyesore from mopac as you cross the lake, but more than likely you’ll be so distracted by the ugliness, you’ll loose control of the car and go barreling through the guardrails to your doom. Hopefully you were wearing your seatbelt though.