Jesus Played for the Ags
Despite the unfortunate loss in double overtime to t.u. last night, we still win where our alumni ball players are concerned.
…Since He was drafted third overall out of Texas A&M in 1986, Christ has been labeled too passive and forgiving to ever lead the Hawks to the promised land. Christ, however, has now apparently decided to turn the other cheek.
…Fans also eagerly await the return of Christ’s “Ascension Dunk,” a crowd favorite. In the patented move, Christ leaps His less-than-league-average 24-inch vertical, and miraculously ascends toward Heaven, floating in mid-air just long enough to stuff the ball. An accompanying angelic choir momentarily stuns His defenders as the ball comes crashing down on their heads. The move wowed audiences and judges at NBA All-Star Slam-N-Jam dunk competitions two years in a row.
From, who else, but The Onion.