The world, as in all those other countries besides ours, has written an open letter beseeching McCain to drop out of the race because…well…if he wins, we’re all going to have to move to the previously mentioned other countries.
“Look, this isn’t funny,” said a world representative, who spoke on condition of anonymity. “You’ve got one candidate who has a reasonably sane and comprehensive foreign policy combined with detailed knowledge of American domestic affairs, and another candidate who isn’t always sure which country he’s talking about and whose domestic policy consists of telling people to stop whining. Why are you even throwing this open to a vote? Are you people out of your minds?”