College Station
(just a note – This post contains blatant supposition, potentially harmful alliterations, and a bit of field reporting from our chief sports correspondent Brian J. Pinero, esquire).
Let’s get the obvious out of the way: College Station, and the cult of Texas A&M that it houses is a weird and mysterious place. I would challenge you to find another spot in this country with as many weird, archaic and potentially psychologically damaging traditions as my Alma Mater.
Ironically on the flip-side, there’s my love/hate relationship with College football. My bias for teams has nothing to do with athleticism or skill, it’s more about history and familial heritage. Much of my family went to the University of Oklahoma. My first dog was a giant yellow lab named Sooner. Guess who i pull for when OU plays Texas. Family events, like Thanksgiving dinner, have in the past taken a back-seat to important rivalry games such as Texas v Texas A&M. Hell, my great-grandfather used to teach my mom and my aunt the ref’s hand signals in the back seat on the way to the OU games. God, apple pie, America and OU’s 47 game-winning-streak that begun in 1953.
So with that both these points in mind I carefully considered Brian’s late friday offer of tickets to the A&M vs Texas Tech Game. A game at Kyle Field is an impressive display of the acoustical influence, team spirit and the power of the Aggie-brainwashing apparatus at work. But Texas Tech is also ranked fifth in the nation, and it was perfect biking weather in Austin. I passed.
B on the other hand did not and, in addition to the game got the chance to return to the mother-womb of A&M, the all-father of our college experience, the TAMU Rec center rock wall. I guessing when he and Brian burst through the front door of the rec center, with the sun at their backs, the music immediately switched to the Rocky theme, life slowed to a quarter of its normal speed, and scantily clad gym-bound co-ed’s all stopped, stared and wondered aloud – are they back? Could LaRochelle be far behind? Then Badowski pulls out his Scarpa Lightnings, puts on a harness, says, “daddy’s home,” and proceeds to climb 5.13c off the couch. (FYI – for those confused, the last sentence there is all climber speak).
LAF ride
Just a reminder, if anyone still wants to kick in for the fundraising on the Livestrong Ride, click here. Many many thanks to all the genrous souls who donated thus far.
Angry Wade's
Apparently, there’s a pub in Brooklyn named after me and everything I stand for. I’ve always wanted a bar named after me, but to have it be angry as well? I think I can die a happy man now.
Tights
I thought this was just a New York thing, spearheaded by my sister and her cohorts, but no, I’ve seen the slow trickle-down-fashion-effect here too. Just tonight, three young ladies at the coffee shop were sporting this unfortunate trend.
People! Specifically, Women! Tights are not pants! Do not be confused by the 80’s – maybe you’re too young to remember but It wasn’t ok then, and it certainly isn’t now (we have the internet now, you all should know better). It’s fine that people in New York engaged in this – they do a lot of other questionable activities – but for the love of god this is Texas, we’re better than this. This year alone we’ve survived, pants-suits and skinny jeans, I’m not sure that we as a texan-nation can handle another challenge of this magnitude.
Fortunately, the good people at tightsarenotpants.com have provided us resources to defend against the lycra clad onslaught. Download their presskit, and pray for the youth of tomorrow. We must not stand idly by.
Friday
Finally, the end of the week. Sunrise over Downtown, taken from the Mopac Bridge over Town Lake.
Chainsaws
The poet who can fix America with his solar-powered chainsaws and compound defended by polygamist haikus.
Third Times the Charm
At Texas A&M, something is supposed to happen three times before it becomes a tradition. We also give our mascot a full military funeral, but that’s another story. Anyhow, this election season, it looks like the GOP plans to steal the election by purging voter rolls in swing states, thereby establishing a nice tradition (by A&M standards), seeing as 2004 and 2000 were stolen by computer fraud and the supreme court, respectively.
Tens of thousands of eligible voters in at least six swing states have been removed from the rolls or have been blocked from registering in ways that appear to violate federal law, according to a review of state records and Social Security data by The New York Times. (NYT)
The article goes on to claim that it’s nobody’s fault (cough-bullshit-cough-cough), not really one party or the other, but the fact remains that your vote may not count. The real point to take home is the flaws in the registration process – we can run a tax system (the IRS will find you if you live on the moon), a social security system and even a national census that dictates our congressional districts but somehow, we cant get our populace registered to vote.
The moral here is that your government would actually prefer you not vote, as it makes their jobs harder.
Funny Money
I’m guessing they blew the first $85 billion on hookers and blow? The presses at the Mint must be running overtime with all the fake monopoly dollars we needing to give away.
The New York Federal Reserve is lending up to $37.8 billion to American International Group to give the troubled insurer access to much-needed cash.
The Band
My lack of Cable has allowed me to make the stunning discovery that, yes in fact, there is an entire show that airs every Sunday morning dedicated to the Aggie Band’s preformance for the week. And it’s in its 14th Season.